Downtime

Finally! I'm enjoying some much needed downtime. I put in a 40-hour work week covering for the clinical manager. I am not an office person, so sitting in a chair was really hard to do. Plus, Danny had off two days last week and I missed hanging out with him.

Of course! On a Saturday, I woke up early, but it was so quiet. I just sat and listened to nothing. Golden! Then, the house started to stir. Danny had to pick up Marisa from a friends house. Tony went in to Habitat to volunteer. The dogs chased squirrels and ate bird seed in the backyard. I decided to play games on the computer. I'm now playing Mahjong Trails and Gardens of Time.

Laundry is going, but at a slow pace. Let the clothes sit in the dryer for a bit. I'm in no hurry. Kitchen is clean because I haven't cooked anything. Coffee pot is still on even though it's mid-afternoon. The sun is shining and it's cool outside. Awww.....

Nice. Downtime.

Teen Speak, Part II

Top ten statements that Danny and I are really tired of hearing:

10) 'We don't have anything to eat." (Translation...'I'm too lazy to make something myself.')
9) 'Are you watching TV?' (Translation...'I want to play xbox and you're in my way.')
8) 'Whatever!' (Translation...'That's stupid, shut up!')
7) 'So!' (Translation...'I don't care what you say!')
6) 'That's so gay!' (Translation...'Wow, you're old!')
5) 'Chill...' (Multiple translations...'hang out', 'calm down')
4) 'Shut my door!' (Translation...'I want to text in private.')
3) 'I'll be home in a little.' (Translation...'Don't tell me a curfew.')
2) 'Seriously?' (Multiple translations...'really?', 'no way', 'are you kidding?')
1) 'I know, right?' (Translation...'I know, right?')

Groomed

I could not get this puppy to be still for the camera. She's just like a kid!

We took Liebe to Petco to be groomed today, because she managed to get gum in her fur. Imagine that...at our house!

She is definitely a designer pooch monster! Oh, by the way, those bows...gone already!

Yellow Tulips

One of the most admired and beloved Spring flowers, tulips represent Eternal Life.

Originally, tulips meant 'hopeless love'.

Now tulips mean 'cheerful thoughts'.

Tulips say 'there's sunshine in your smile.'

I received these beautiful tulips from my co-workers today.
When I brought them home, Marisa wanted to take pictures of them.
She did a marvelous job capturing the 'meaning' of tulips.
Thank you, Facility South Team!!

I Have Grieved

Grief is personal, a process, a journey. The journey is different for everyone. I understand the stages of grief: numbness, disorganization, and reorganization. Intellectually, I get it. Ironically, I help other people in the beginning of their grief process in the work I do everyday. Emotionally, I'm living it, too!

I grieved in Texas. Went through the process of 'wrapping up' Dad's affairs in Texas. Going through the motions. Then, I returned to Colorado. Wow! Again, I went through those initial emotions of loss. 'Dad would never come to my house again. Dad won't get to play with our new puppy. He won't see our new stove. If we move, Dad won't know where we are.' Not all these statements are rational, they are words from a grieving daughter.

My grief is compounded because my mom died 2 years and 2 months ago. I was just getting used to not calling her everyday on the way home from work. I was just getting used to not hearing her nebulizer and oxygen machine humming. One of the last words I heard my mom say was to my daughter in response to what kind of golf shoes to get. I could hear her over the phone yelling, "Foot Joys, get Foot Joys." My daughter made the golf team that year!

How have I been grieving? I've been fortunate enough to have off work. Can you imagine being a hospice social worker at this time?

So, I watch TV; do laundry; read; eat ice cream; sleep; write 'thank you' cards; go through photos; post my blog; update my resume; play with the dogs; cry; reminisce with the kids; check in at work; fold and unfold blankets; got a haircut; text my brother a million times; and, just sit on the sofa.

Tomorrow I go back to work for half a day. I have a feeling it will be a difficult day.